They don’t taste the same anymore
They don’t seem to last that long either
They look like carrots all orange and such
But are tasteless and don’t inspire much
After two days your enormous whopper
Of a carrot has shriveled down to nothing

The Clementines you once ate Christmas
Which seemed to last a month
But now after two days on the dining table
They’ve became a mountain of muff
Even the oranges and other sources of vitamin c
Follow the same hypocrisy

Don’t get me talking about the banana
They go from green and hard to liquid lava
Tasteless and emotionless
You have to drown them in cinnamon
To force feed your self their benefits
While lopping off their darker bits

The potato yes our magical friend
From mash to roast to chips oh chips
But they come already black and blue
Always one goes rotten in a day
Stinking the house out in every way
Oh poor potato what have they done to you

I spotted on line veg from local farmers
Maybe this food is up to it
But I’ll have to order 1kg of everything
What can I do with so many zucchine
Obviously the price is also steep
So I have to eat all of it

So we resort to brutal tactics
Frozen veg already cut down to size
My broccoli ain’t turning yellow in my freezer
And spinach cubes become veggie pies
And when all else fails sweet peas in a jar
Cooked in white wine and bits of onion

Instead of overcooked and sour aubergine
We open cans of sweetcorn
We have chickpeas that last a week
And oily artichokes with thorns
Then we have cans of lovely beans
That we lovingly pour on the toast

It’s a real pain in the arse buying veg
You pay so much for a 2kg cauliflower
When you get home and cut off the leaves
You don’t get much flower power
We don’t even have time for the tomato
What the hell is wrong with them jeez