If only things weren’t so complicated
Mind spins bureaucracy endlessly
The red tape traps the unsuspecting victims
The long pause of thought unwritable
Painting scenes that will never be acted
Words jotted down never to be spoken
But what about me how do I cut
Do I bleed
Why do I whine and complain
When everything is sunshine
But I see the clouds on the horizon
Even if they are not coming my way
It’s an imperfection on a good day

Why don’t I speak freely about
Every thing I am or should be
The ghosts in the mirror gag me
What I have on my mind
Is not interesting for you
It does not fit in with your ideals
I’ve already decided what not to say
I know you don’t like football so no score
The music I love just irrates you more
Politics is just a warzone not good news
We will be enemies by verse two

So I stay silent because I’ve already
Had this conversation in my head
Then there are those people who say
The same old phrases and same old jokes
A new sitcom based on a 1940s film
It’s not original and it’s not kind
It doesn’t even absorb into my mind
So if I haven’t got anything new or original
To say that I’m going to be silent

I don’t really want to talk to women
Because that’s flirting or stalking
When it comes to the men
Too friendly can be a little awkward
I’ve never been one to share a shower
Best turn off the lights in any place
Because I’ve seen what I’ve become
It’s not a pretty sight so off with the light
I’ve a lot more of these it could take all night

So before we become friends I have to think
Are you only talking to me because I drink
You might like me, have some esteem for me
But you are wrong there is nothing to see here
What’s the point of making friends now
Because I know we will argue over a pizza
So I save you the bother I stay distant
I’ll pretend I’ve never ever met you
When people get close I push them away
Not to be a bastard but to brighten their day
I will hurt you in some way some day
So it will be better if you just keep away

Don’t read my poems they will demoralise you
They are only words that anyone can write
While a novel needs planning and dedication
My poems are just a jumble of knotted wool
I have already judged myself
Now I am condemned
It’s best not to get too close
My bullshit is contagious
I’m just doing you a favour
I’m putting up this front
I’m doing this to protect you
From this arrogant cunt

When I sit at home and try to reflect
All the people I have touched and met
I feel like I’m a curse and and stain for them
I hope they have already decided to forget him
Treat me as a stranger treat me as if I’m dead
Then none of my nonsense can get into your head
For me it’s like after the first kiss the relationship is over
The barriers are broken down and the soul is bared
Now I don’t intend to kiss anyone anywhere
Knowing my treatment isn’t exactly fair

I seem to enjoy more the preparation and cooking
The eating now is just an afterthought
It’s like being half an hour away from your destination
I’m already thinking the vacancy has already ended
I’m always thinking ahead I’m at the end credits
How have I survived so long without merit
I just have to know what does come next
I’m even like this when I watch Netflix

I’m a fucking disaster but I can’t tell you way
I’m planning my funeral and a quick way to die
I’d think let’s get it over with and out of the way
So the people who know me won’t suffer another day
What a glorious place this world would be
If it went on without a leech like me
What did you do to deserve this surprise
Give it five seconds your love will melt into despise
I’m looking for the answers before the question has been read
I’m braking on green and revving on red
Maybe I should leave everywhere for good
Silence my voice like a good boy should.