There was a time
When I was red
I use to shoot rubber bullets
And pretend to be dead
I found the gun wrapped up
Sitting idly under a Christmas tree
It was wrapped in secondhand paper
So I just knew it was for me

Christmas always came and went
When cheap chocolate was consumed
It wasn’t long before I was rolling my eggs
In Avenham park I presume
All this time of being a boy
Always losing his favourite toy
Nobody wanted to grow into a man
Now I am that, I want a refund

Nobody told us about the war inside our heads
Or the conflicting news reports
We all wished to live like a prince
Staying clear of witches and worts
Only if there was a dragon two paces behind
Nobody would disrespect you any more
You’ll never be late for work
If you learn to fly on that beast

Fantasy can be fun
A reachable place
That’s neither here nor there
You will always win the fight
Select the distressed damsel with red hair
Live in bliss and prosper

There was a time
I thought I could sing
Kings of the wild frontier
Maybe I was bluffing
Wanted a white stripe on my nose
Dress up in highwayman’s clothes
Can’t get the words right in Ant Rap
I gave up as I was feeling crap

Good songs always came and went
Top of the pops became perverse
Nobody knew how to play instruments
Oasis came on and made it worse
Something happen it was the Prodigy
They were a breath of fresh air to me
Saw them live in Manchester
We’ve lost Keith, the one with spiked hair

Nobody told us of the Starman
They kept us away from everything glam
We all wanted to dress like Johnny Rotten
Filthy Lucre and the disco was forgotten
Wouldn’t it be great if we all had a bodyguard
No more bullies in the school yard
Someone smiles and opens the door
Picks your drunk ass off the floor

Fantasy can be fun
If you can put it in verse
Get a record deal
Start the curse
Drugs and alcohol killed again
Ease the pressure ease the pain

There was a time
When I was really small
I was empty of knowledge
I didn’t know sod all
I read the famous five
And drank lemonade
Went to primary school
And did what every kid did

The school years came and went
I got so tired of wearing a tie
It wasn’t long before my appearance changed
And the scared the fuck out of everyone
Something happened and I grew my hair
Got harassed from almost everywhere
Got a few piercings went to some gigs
Got a new pastime like every kid did

Nobody told us of the dangers
Us humans aren’t made to last
Some hobbies will be the death of you
Even if you had a blast
Wouldn’t it be great if we were indestructible
And could drink ten pints every night
That everyone kept their dignity and calm
Instead of the usual fight

Fantasy can be really fun
Until those men take you away
You didn’t follow the regime
Now kid you have to pay
Society wasn’t made for you to abuse it
So stick to the rules and don’t lose it
We’re a corrupt society welcome home
Live with that or die alone